Sunday, September 09, 2007

Five Stages of Yarnaholism (or how I couldn't resist Alchemy at 25% off)


Suggest problem has corrected itself and it will soon be over
“I need this new yarn to make the shawl I saw in that book, that’s all. I will certainly not buy any more yarn, after today.”

Exhibit apathy and numbness
“No problem. I have the cash. It’s no big deal. So what if it doesn’t fit in my yarn closet or in the basket in the living room or in the Rubbermaid storage bin in the garage.”

“I’ll make it fit. Heck, I deserve this. It’s only yarn.”


Sabotage the change effort
“If I go to the yarn sale, I might buy yarn. But if I don’t go I’ll miss seeing my knitting pals and having a good time. I’ll go to the sale.”

Play "shoot the messenger"
“Damn that salesperson. If she hadn’t told me the Alchemy was on sale, I never would have bought it. Well, I might have. I would have. Damn her.”

Withdraw from society
“Okay, fine. So, you want to make something out of it? Get outta my way; I’m going shopping.”


Cut a deal to spare others harm
“Honey, I know I said I wouldn’t buy any more yarn. But see, this yarn I’ve looked at so many times is on sale. And I’ll never-ever-ever find it on sale again at this price. And, you know, they discontinue yarns all the time. So, if I buy this yarn, uhm, you can buy that baseball card you’ve been wanting. And we’ll both be on purchase restriction after that.”

Suggest other concerns to redirect problem solving
“Well, I’m just glad I paid that insurance bill. Don’t have to think about that any more. Isn’t that great? Oh, and I have to remember to pick up the dry cleaning. Did I water the tomato plants today?”


Express a loss of control
“I admit it’s getting a little out of hand. The yarn in little pyramid piles on the floor was cute for a while. I just don’t see it as a design element anymore. I’m never going to be able to knit all this yarn.”

Withdraw from society.
“I’ve now officially got SABLE (Stash Acquired Beyond Life Expectancy). I’m just going to have to forego any more yarn sales. If I go, I’ll buy. I’ll just become a hermit. That’s all there is to it.”


Express ownership for solutions
“I do not need any more yarn. I must take a stand.”

Focus on achieving benefits
“When I finish using at least … 30% of my stash, then I can buy more yarn. But not until then! Okay, 20%.”


Greenwich Yarn End of Summer Sale is from September 7 - 23. Topnotch yarns from 25%-70% off, including Alchemy, Debbie Bliss, Noro, and many, many more. I'm not kidding -- it's an extraordinary sale. If you're in the Bay Area, it's worth a trip.

Greenwich Yarn
2073 Greenwich
San Francisco, CA 94123


Laritza said...

That is too funny! the yarn is lovely :D

maria said...

Congratulations!!! Even if you never knit it up, you'll still have it to make you happy. You can look at it, touch it, even sleep with it if you really want to. When will "those people" realize we need yarn AND air to live! Oh, and food too. Preferably good food.

Aim said...

How compelling...good thing I live in the Great Lakes (where, you know, yarn is hard to come by) heh ;O)

Jane said...

How could you really resist? Beautiful colors and very yummy fiber.Think of it as stash enhancement!